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Maybe this day really is evil...

First off, woke up STILL with the headache that I went to bed with last night. Hate hate hate migraines, or sinus headaches, or whatever the hell they are. Suck. Which isn't all that important considering *after* I got up, but still is suckitude for me in an immediate sense.

So as I said, headache is bad enough, but then just a bit after noon the phone rings and my father answers it. It's one of his family up in Wisconsin (he has a large family, and most of them stayed up around there to live. We're in Maryland, for those playing along who don't know). Apparently his sister-in-law Stella had died... well, I don't know when. Someone had tried to call yesterday when apparently no one was there to get the phone (or of course they're just lying or whatever), and instead of y'know leaving a message on the answering machine or something, they don't bother to do anything except wait until today to call back. (Yeah, that'd be a crap message to leave on the answering machine, but at least they could say "hey, this is so and so, please call back as soon as you get this message" or whatever.)

And the kicker? The funeral is *tomorrow*. Which means that my father, with an overdeveloped sense of familial obligation IMHO, left on like 1 or 2 hours' notice to drive from Maryland up to Wisconsin, *hopefully* arriving in time for the funeral. Lovely.

I knew there was a reason I don't go in for the whole extended "family" thing much. -_-

And heck, just for the heck of it and since I haven't done one for a while... a poll!

Poll #743242 What Would You Do?

If you were called in such a situation on such short notice to a funeral so far away, for an in-law, would you...

a) Immediately (or within a couple hours) start driving up.
0(0.0%)
b) Make your apologies and say how sorry you were that you couldn't make the funeral.
14(87.5%)
c) Same as b, but with an added dose of btiching-out.
2(12.5%)
e) Make some other arrangements, such as trying to find a flight, even on a tight budget.
0(0.0%)
e) Say nothing, but start hiring hitmen.
0(0.0%)


Insert any other options in comments, whatever.

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Comments

( 9 Notes — Write a Footnote )
stormfeather
Jun. 6th, 2006 10:58 pm (UTC)
And voting on my own poll I chose "b," but with an inner dialogue throughout the "so sorries" that would be closer to "c."

And yeah, I realize that I probably should have tried to phone around and find him a flight tonight, tomorrow morning, whatever, even if I paid for it myself. But being loopy on a) headache pain, b) lack of sleep from aforesaid pain, and c) NyQuil.... didn't even think of it.
scifantasy
Jun. 6th, 2006 11:04 pm (UTC)
I don't think it was malicious intent, likely grief and not thinking straight colliding with a thread of "he should hear it from me in person." Why that precluded a "call me when you get this" message...grief, recall.
culfinriel
Jun. 6th, 2006 11:07 pm (UTC)
Kind of depends on how close I was to the person/family. Unless I was really close, I'd probably go for option 2.
missysedai
Jun. 6th, 2006 11:21 pm (UTC)
What Frankie-Lynn said. For most of my in-laws, no, sorry, can't drop everything and be there, terribly sorry.

For Mark's parents, obviously, it's a different matter, and my SIL Sandi, too.
frankie23
Jun. 6th, 2006 11:30 pm (UTC)
I may be considered a bit "cold", but I don't see the big deal in funerals, except to comfort those still living. I'd try to make it there to be supportive, but I wouldn't bust my hump trying to make it to the actual big to-do.
kaziel_fateseer
Jun. 7th, 2006 12:02 am (UTC)
I voted b, but with a potential A, based on how much I liked the sibling-in-law. Of course, since I'm really an only child, I can't say for certain. >.>
ceara
Jun. 7th, 2006 02:02 am (UTC)
I can't really answer that, as it depends 100% on how close the family in question is.

If my brother's boyfriend died I would make every effort humanly possible, and probably try to invent a few new ones, to be there for my brother, because he'd really need all the support he could get.
jsbowden
Jun. 7th, 2006 12:37 pm (UTC)
I made a last minute trip on Sunday to Connecticut to attend the funeral of my wife's paternal grandmother (we had four days notice though, as opposed to ONE) on Monday.
stormfeather
Jun. 7th, 2006 06:58 pm (UTC)
Sorry to hear that. About the death, I mean.
( 9 Notes — Write a Footnote )